We all, I think, have a list of priorities. There are things that matter to us, some a little more than others, and, probably without much in the way of conscious thought, we arrange those things into neat little tiers.
Now, for a lot, if not most, of us, the higher tiers will be filled with the health and wellbeing of those we love. Families, friends, partners, and quite rightly so.
But somewhere, possibly a few tiers down, there are those other loves. The ones we don’t always admit. Those personal obsessions, that mean nothing, or next to nothing to most other people, the ‘extra’ bits of life that go that one step beyond hobby or interest to become something more.
It’s one of those I’d like to talk about today.
A Swing And A Miss
There are some who know me, who might guess at my own personal obsession (although, to be fair, there’s more than one they could choose from), but if you were going for the musical stylings of Madness, or the wonderful, multi-layered, landmark television show known as Buffy The Vampire Slayer, you were wide of the mark.
Because today’s obsession of choice is Leeds United AFC.
And now that the dust cloud caused by people stampeding for the door is beginning to clear let me clarify.
It's The Hope That Kills You
You see, today’s post both is and isn’t going to be about football. I won’t be going into the finer points of a 4-3-3 over a 4-4-2, or the merits of a low block against a high press (don’t forget to close the door behind you). I won’t even be mentioning the offside rule or VAR. No, although today’s post is ‘about’ football it has more to do with the vagaries of being a fan—and the emotional rollercoaster that can entail.
For those who live their lives in glorious, untainted, ignorance of such trivialities, the weekend just gone saw my beloved Leeds relegated from The Premier League, the top division of English football. It was not a pleasant experience.
If I’m honest, the cards have been on the table for quite some time, as bad result followed worse result, and the failure to pick up points saw us tumble unceremoniously down the league table, our descent arrested by those who were equally or almost equally as dire.
It never stops you hoping, though, and that’s the terrible thing. You can see the reality of the situation—like watching a car crash in super slow motion with the full knowledge there’s not a thing you can do about it (I tried. I wore the kit, my souvenir shirt from ’92, my lucky pants, everything. I’ve no idea why things with no direct causal link to the performance of 11 professionals playing football miles away failed to deliver. Go figure, huh?). You still hope, though. You still live in that unfounded state of expectation that some miracle will occur.
And now that the dust cloud caused by people stampeding for the door is beginning to clear let me clarify.
It's The Hope That Kills You
You see, today’s post both is and isn’t going to be about football. I won’t be going into the finer points of a 4-3-3 over a 4-4-2, or the merits of a low block against a high press (don’t forget to close the door behind you). I won’t even be mentioning the offside rule or VAR. No, although today’s post is ‘about’ football it has more to do with the vagaries of being a fan—and the emotional rollercoaster that can entail.
For those who live their lives in glorious, untainted, ignorance of such trivialities, the weekend just gone saw my beloved Leeds relegated from The Premier League, the top division of English football. It was not a pleasant experience.
If I’m honest, the cards have been on the table for quite some time, as bad result followed worse result, and the failure to pick up points saw us tumble unceremoniously down the league table, our descent arrested by those who were equally or almost equally as dire.
It never stops you hoping, though, and that’s the terrible thing. You can see the reality of the situation—like watching a car crash in super slow motion with the full knowledge there’s not a thing you can do about it (I tried. I wore the kit, my souvenir shirt from ’92, my lucky pants, everything. I’ve no idea why things with no direct causal link to the performance of 11 professionals playing football miles away failed to deliver. Go figure, huh?). You still hope, though. You still live in that unfounded state of expectation that some miracle will occur.
And then it doesn’t.
Again.
Exciting Times
And thus, with an inevitability that seems crystal clear in hindsight, the worst happens. At a stroke (which admittedly took several months to write), Leeds are back where we were when Marcelo Bielsa took a group of bang average Championship players and transformed them into winners, playing a brand of footie that was exciting, and on occasion, beautiful.
It wasn’t just the game, either. The Bielsa years ignited something in the fan base, in the city. It brought people together, inspired murals on city walls, and a sense of belonging and being belonged to. It birthed togetherness, a connection between team and fans that had been missing. A passion that had dwindled.
Now, though, all that is at danger. We’re looking at the potential of seasons after season of mediocrity once again, and those fairweather friends who climbed aboard the crazy train in those halcyon Bielsa years drifting away. It’s a sad time. A frustrating time,
Which, I guess, is the point of this post. It's not, as I say, about football, it’s not about Leeds. You could substitute the rise and fall of your favourite band, the ending of that T.V. show you love in a whimper rather than the expected bang, or the empty seats at your church. Whatever it is that you’re passionate about, right or wrong as it may be in other people’s estimation, it matters to you, and that means it matters.
Only Human
We’re quirky little beings, us humans. Individuals with our own peccadillos (Which I’m ashamed to say, back when I was young and stupid, I used to think were some kind of armadillo—Don’t worry, I’m not young any more), viewpoints, and beliefs. We’re capable of wrong thinking in so many ways—of attributing our mental wellbeing to things we have no control of and suffering as a consequence. Identifying with country, cause, or club in a way that means when they are dealt a blow, you feel the pain.
It wasn’t just the game, either. The Bielsa years ignited something in the fan base, in the city. It brought people together, inspired murals on city walls, and a sense of belonging and being belonged to. It birthed togetherness, a connection between team and fans that had been missing. A passion that had dwindled.
Now, though, all that is at danger. We’re looking at the potential of seasons after season of mediocrity once again, and those fairweather friends who climbed aboard the crazy train in those halcyon Bielsa years drifting away. It’s a sad time. A frustrating time,
Which, I guess, is the point of this post. It's not, as I say, about football, it’s not about Leeds. You could substitute the rise and fall of your favourite band, the ending of that T.V. show you love in a whimper rather than the expected bang, or the empty seats at your church. Whatever it is that you’re passionate about, right or wrong as it may be in other people’s estimation, it matters to you, and that means it matters.
Only Human
We’re quirky little beings, us humans. Individuals with our own peccadillos (Which I’m ashamed to say, back when I was young and stupid, I used to think were some kind of armadillo—Don’t worry, I’m not young any more), viewpoints, and beliefs. We’re capable of wrong thinking in so many ways—of attributing our mental wellbeing to things we have no control of and suffering as a consequence. Identifying with country, cause, or club in a way that means when they are dealt a blow, you feel the pain.
It’s probably not healthy, but I think it’s an integral part of the human experience. We live a baseline existence, but it is the things we feel those moments of passion that can elevate that, for however brief a time. To quote a television show I might have already mentioned:-
-’if we could live without passion, maybe we’d know some peace. But we would be hollow. Empty rooms, shuttered and dark. Without passion we’d be truly dead’.
Now, bring on next season, and our inevitable promotion! MOT!
Until next time…
Hey, there! If you enjoyed reading any of the above, why not take a look at some of my published work? Below you’ll find links to a number of short stories I’m lucky enough to have included in anthologies. I’d love to know what you think
New Tales Of Old: Volume 2
https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B09TMVTX9H/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o00_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1
Death Ship
https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/9198684140/ref=cm_sw_r_apan_glt_fabc_TWEMTA3KWK7T89QEZPF6?fbclid=IwAR322Fx5nfgVUQAA62ZZ6CUsNnBm8pbSxPanzz6Qkjg3vAv4ESipq7iKKhs
https://www.waterstones.com/book/death-ship/david-green/s-o-green/9789198684148?fbclid=IwAR2gP4CXHSG7wTccO39wOqXFtI81k0259Ep8DUM48Ki6kTUdlKoF3yafojA
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/9198684140/ref=ewc_pr_img_1?smid=A2XZ7JICGUQ1CX&psc=1&fbclid=IwAR2Wa6sGxb82_VCsC7l1CGXwHjsSwTheqba6jDX_G8EDsywZoGpC93nXr2w
Reaperman
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Reaperman-Drabbles-3-Legends-Night-ebook/dp/B099NNPTQ1A
Pestilence
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Pestilence-Revelations-Black-Ink-Fiction/dp/B09MDLZGHY/ref=sr_1_1?crid=2VP38WZDWJVAF&keywords=black+ink+fiction&qid=1654090896&sprefix=black+ink+fiction%2Caps%2C218&sr=8-1
The Musketeers Vs Cthulhu
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Musketeers-Cthulhu-Court-King-Louis-ebook/dp/B09YQKQQB7/ref=sr_1_18?crid=2VP38WZDWJVAF&keywords=black+ink+fiction&qid=1654091002&sprefix=black+ink+fiction%2Caps%2C218&sr=8-18
Now, bring on next season, and our inevitable promotion! MOT!
Until next time…
Hey, there! If you enjoyed reading any of the above, why not take a look at some of my published work? Below you’ll find links to a number of short stories I’m lucky enough to have included in anthologies. I’d love to know what you think
New Tales Of Old: Volume 2
https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B09TMVTX9H/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o00_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1
Death Ship
https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/9198684140/ref=cm_sw_r_apan_glt_fabc_TWEMTA3KWK7T89QEZPF6?fbclid=IwAR322Fx5nfgVUQAA62ZZ6CUsNnBm8pbSxPanzz6Qkjg3vAv4ESipq7iKKhs
https://www.waterstones.com/book/death-ship/david-green/s-o-green/9789198684148?fbclid=IwAR2gP4CXHSG7wTccO39wOqXFtI81k0259Ep8DUM48Ki6kTUdlKoF3yafojA
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/9198684140/ref=ewc_pr_img_1?smid=A2XZ7JICGUQ1CX&psc=1&fbclid=IwAR2Wa6sGxb82_VCsC7l1CGXwHjsSwTheqba6jDX_G8EDsywZoGpC93nXr2w
Reaperman
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Reaperman-Drabbles-3-Legends-Night-ebook/dp/B099NNPTQ1A
Pestilence
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Pestilence-Revelations-Black-Ink-Fiction/dp/B09MDLZGHY/ref=sr_1_1?crid=2VP38WZDWJVAF&keywords=black+ink+fiction&qid=1654090896&sprefix=black+ink+fiction%2Caps%2C218&sr=8-1
The Musketeers Vs Cthulhu
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Musketeers-Cthulhu-Court-King-Louis-ebook/dp/B09YQKQQB7/ref=sr_1_18?crid=2VP38WZDWJVAF&keywords=black+ink+fiction&qid=1654091002&sprefix=black+ink+fiction%2Caps%2C218&sr=8-18
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