Have you ever heard a personal story that really affected you?
I’m talking about the kind of searingly honest revelation that completely changed the way you think about someone or something. The kind of testimony that stuck around in your mind for a while afterwards, made you think, and maybe even challenge a few preconceptions.
Because that very thing happened to me this week.
Man Stuff
I’m not going to name names, although the story I’m referencing is in the public sphere, suffice it to say the gentleman to whom the story belongs is a YouTuber, putting him ever so slightly in the public sphere.
He is a popular name in the Leeds United YouTube sphere. Someone who posts regularly about the club and the wonderful game of football as a whole. He’s funny, he’s loud, he’s opinionated, and, as he’s publicly announced this very week, he has his problems with mental health, and with substance abuse. Coupled with his now public struggles with his bisexuality, this has caused something of a breakdown, which in turn caused him to stop publishing content for a couple of weeks. His return was a tearful, and, as I’ve said, a very public ‘confession’ of all of this.
It was, all of it, a major surprise to me. I don’t personally know the bloke, other than what he cares to share with his followers, but the brash, laddish, confidence he exudes just didn’t seem to fit with this revelation. I think this, possibly, might be one reason the struggles with his sexuality began in the first place. A type of toxic masculinity.
And that’s self taught, self loathing stayed with me.
Same Differences
I’ve heard it said that everyone you meet in life, whether poet, prince, or pauper, is going through something you will probably never hear about.
It might be medical, it might be a family matter, it could come from grief, mental illness, generational trauma, or a hundred other things, but it will be there.
Now, there are professionals and support groups in pretty much all those spheres who can provide individuals with help, but beyond and possibly above that there’s something that you and I can do, too.
Be kind.
It costs nothing to listen. It costs nothing to empathise. It costs nothing to put your own prejudices, assumptions, and moralising to one side and at least try to understand. Is this always easy? No. I think, to a degree, we all live with inherited systems of viewing this world. We all started from a fixed point in time and space. We are all victims of our circumstances.
One And All
But we can be so much more. We can grow. We can learn. We can see people as people. Just fellow travelers on the road to nowhere. We can recognise when a spike of unearned distrust at some difference rears its head, work out why that feeling arose, and realise how stupid it is. We can learn to listen when someone tells us who they are. We can look at ourselves and learn to be honest and accepting of exactly who we are and why that’s okay. We can build a world where doing those things is easier and more accepted, changing one mind at a time, and starting with our own.
Because that lack of acceptance, that fear which can so often turn to anger, builds walls between us.
And so, as we enter the Xmas, Yule, Hannukah, Kwanzaa, Shalako period (apologies to those I’ve forgotten and race toward a brand new year, why not just try that.
Be kind.
Until next time!
Hey, there! If you enjoyed reading any of the above, why not take a look at some of my published work? Below you’ll find links to a number of short stories I’m lucky enough to have included in anthologies. I’d love to know what you think.
New Tales Of Old
Death Ship
Pestilence: Drabbles 1
Reaperman: Drabbles 3
The Musketeers Vs Cthulhu
Eldritch Investigations
Same Differences
I’ve heard it said that everyone you meet in life, whether poet, prince, or pauper, is going through something you will probably never hear about.
It might be medical, it might be a family matter, it could come from grief, mental illness, generational trauma, or a hundred other things, but it will be there.
Now, there are professionals and support groups in pretty much all those spheres who can provide individuals with help, but beyond and possibly above that there’s something that you and I can do, too.
Be kind.
It costs nothing to listen. It costs nothing to empathise. It costs nothing to put your own prejudices, assumptions, and moralising to one side and at least try to understand. Is this always easy? No. I think, to a degree, we all live with inherited systems of viewing this world. We all started from a fixed point in time and space. We are all victims of our circumstances.
One And All
But we can be so much more. We can grow. We can learn. We can see people as people. Just fellow travelers on the road to nowhere. We can recognise when a spike of unearned distrust at some difference rears its head, work out why that feeling arose, and realise how stupid it is. We can learn to listen when someone tells us who they are. We can look at ourselves and learn to be honest and accepting of exactly who we are and why that’s okay. We can build a world where doing those things is easier and more accepted, changing one mind at a time, and starting with our own.
Because that lack of acceptance, that fear which can so often turn to anger, builds walls between us.
And so, as we enter the Xmas, Yule, Hannukah, Kwanzaa, Shalako period (apologies to those I’ve forgotten and race toward a brand new year, why not just try that.
Be kind.
Until next time!
#
Hey, there! If you enjoyed reading any of the above, why not take a look at some of my published work? Below you’ll find links to a number of short stories I’m lucky enough to have included in anthologies. I’d love to know what you think.
New Tales Of Old
Death Ship
Pestilence: Drabbles 1
Reaperman: Drabbles 3
The Musketeers Vs Cthulhu
Eldritch Investigations
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