Last Christmas

Hello, dear readers!

Yep, it's that time again.

I'm not just talking about 'new post day', although I’m sure that alone is enough to send a tingle down the spine of literally some (or fewer) of you lovely people. No, what I mean is that special time of year, that most festive of days, that silliest of seasons... In short Christmas!

Now, I'm not what you would call a religious man so that particular aspect of this Friday's upcoming festivities are somewhat lost on me. When it comes to spending time with the family, exchanging gifts, eating waaay too much food, and perhaps enjoying the odd cheeky snifter though, well there, I'm your man. With that in mind you can probably appreciate that I'm very much looking forward to the big day and this year in particular perhaps more than ever.

The reason for this was actually touched upon in a previous post (Hand In Glove) and I did promise to expand on it, so here we go.

In order to set the scene I need you to travel back to a couple of weeks before Xmas last year. It's a Monday, the day of the office 'Secret Santa' no less and yours truly is wearing a rather natty festive jumper. All I had to do was to get from the house to the car, drive to work and get from the car into the  building I worked in. You've probably already figured out that this did not go well.

The problem came at the first step. In fact the problem was the first step. To be a little more specific it was the step leading out of our house. Now, this is not a huge obstacle, measuring perhaps three, maybe four inches high and in fact was one that I had, until that fateful morn, been traversing several times a day. Not that day though. That day I took a fall.

As my wheelchair pitched forwards I fell into a kind of bridge position, catching myself on my hands. I heard (or thought I heard) a snapping sound and unable to right myself, flopped over sideways like the proverbial sack of king Edwards. Initially I thought I had broken my leg but, after one ambulance ride, pretty much a whole day of waiting around in the hospital and a couple of x-rays this was ruled out in favour of muscular/tendon damage. It later turned out that this was a torn hamstring and a damaged adductor muscle.

The doctors in the hospital seemed keen on returning me home despite the fact that no weight could be borne through my left leg. You might think this not to be too much of problem for a wheelchair user but I do still need to stand and take a few paces to do things like get in and out of the car. Eventually, after what seemed like far too much prevaricating the decision was made to admit me. The rest of the day was more of the aforementioned waiting as beds seemed to be in short supply

So started a process of healing that involved three days in hospital and five weeks in a 'rehabilitation centre'.

I'm sure, dear readers that you will have realised that this period covers the whole of the festive period. Now this perhaps wasn't quite as bad as you may be imagining. Yes, I was an in-patient on Christmas day and New Year’s Eve. Yes I was in some pain on both occasions. The kind folk at the 'rehabilitation centre'  did see fit to let me out on day release for those occasions however, under the not inconsiderable care of the lovely Mrs Seated Perspective (told you she was long suffering). Now, you might be thinking that this is the silver lining of the story. I mean I did get to spend Xmas day with loved ones, I did get to stuff myself silly, have a couple of beers, and even pull a cracker... There was one fly in the ointment though, one thing that changed what had been a great day into some kind of special torture. I got to spend a lovely day outside the confines of the institution that had become my prison… but I had to go back. 

Returning to the clinically Spartan surroundings of my room to spend the night on my own after the laughter and cheer of the day was almost impossibly difficult and I'm not ashamed to admit that a small, emotional yet manly tear may have stained my pillow that night.

So yes, this year every single mouthful of turkey, every mince pie, and every game of charades will be given its full value. In fact it will be given its full value twice, as we're having a second Xmas for my lovely step daughter who isn't with us for the actual day this year. At the end of the day though I will have the satisfaction of knowing I have my own bed and my own wife and really, that is the best present I could have.

I’m still not eating sprouts though!