Sunday 22 May 2016

Hi-de-Hi? Hi-de-NO!



Hello Dear Readers!

I have had a holiday, and I'd like to take it up professionally.
Kylie Minogue

A quote from the infinitely perfect Ms Minogue; not a bad way to start a post, eh? Yes pictures might be better but as this is an epistolic venture and I don’t want to get too distracted I think it will probably suffice.

As the above quote hints at, the subject for this week’s offering is holidays and in particular the trip to sunny Somerset recently undertaken by the Seated Perspective clan.

Before I dive into those particular waters however, I would just like to update regular readers on the house situation. Unfortunately we have had to withdraw our offer on the property I mentioned in my last post (see The New Loo Blues - A Moving Story.  ) due to the downstairs toilet issue being a non-starter. It’s a real shame but it has sharpened our resolve to find that perfect forever home and we have another viewing this very week.

Right, back to the subject at hand. 

It was Monday when we set off for Brean, a small town near Weston-Super-Mare on the south-west coast of the UK. Our party consisted of Tina, my wife; Gwen, my mother-in-law; Bonnie, our dog; and lastly and possibly least, my good self. It was warm and sunny as we set off and our spirits were understandably high, as we looked forwards to our four relaxing days away. As the title of the post probably reveals this mood wasn’t one that necessarily stuck.

The holiday had been booked about three weeks ago, after a lot of time spent online attempting to find something suitable. We’d started by trying to get a wheelchair friendly caravan similar to the one we’d stayed in a couple of years back. Haven, the company we had used for that (rather lovely) holiday had nothing to offer us though. It was the same story for about four or five different companies we looked at, and a theme soon became prevalent too. There were, you see, caravans that were suitable for a wheelchair user. Although somewhat thin on the ground they do actually exist, and more importantly a couple were available. There were also caravans where dogs were allowed and these were pretty plentiful too. What there was a seemingly total absence of  however, were caravans suitable for wheelchair users where dogs were also permitted.


via GIPHY

Now one of the highlights of the aforementioned Haven holiday were the long walks with Bonnie, our young Labrador/springer spaniel cross. The time spent watching her run around like a rocket fuelled idiot on the beach, curious about everything and anything she came across, and the way she got Tina and I to be that touch more active too, despite my natural tendency towards energy conservation, pretty much made the holiday. It was therefore with great relief that we came across Pontins-Brean Sands. Yes, they said, they had a bungalow available (for a premium naturally) which would be suitable for a wheelchair user. Yes, we were told, dogs were more than welcome, just not in the complex buildings. All in all it sounded pretty much tailor made.

Thus it was, that as we pulled into the resort, a four and a half hour journey behind us, we were understandably perturbed to see a ‘no pets allowed’ sign proudly displayed at the gate.

What followed was a rather intense yet polite conversation with the lady staffing reception. We were told that Bonnie would be allowed stay with us in the bungalow, could walk the few metres from there to the main gate and… that was it. Not exactly the dog friendly resort we had been sold.


Still, with stereotypically British pluck we decided that, as the holiday was paid for and it was a four and a half hour return trip (we actually made it in nine and a half on the way back due to traffic), we would keep calm, carry on and make the best of things. That being decided we collected the bungalow key and made for our wheelchair friendly accommodation.

You’re probably way ahead of me by now aren’t you?

‘Wheelchair friendly’ in this instance meant a temporary, fold up ramp that could be fitted to the front step. The doors were just about wide enough, and to be fair there was plenty of room to navigate around the place. That was just about the extent of it though. The bathroom had no grab handles, no raised toilet seat, and one small bath fitted with a wonderfully hampering glass shower screen. The shower itself was situated above the bath of course and again did not come with any grab handles or seats; a real slip hazard. This meant that a good wash was about all I managed for four days. I really do pity the ladies on that return trip to Yorkshire



Bathroom aside the other important room for a wheelchair user is the kitchen. This was the smallest room in the bungalow and, although I could get in, getting out meant shifting into reverse. The oven was also partially set behind the door making cooking a decided inconvenience and there were no lowered work surfaces or sink. I am quite mobile for a wheelchair user, my upper body strength is good and my reach pretty formidable. For those with more severe disabilities though this holiday home would have been a real challenge if not an impossibility and importantly, when the holiday was booked, the severity of my condition was a subject that was never enquired after..

The above matters aside, the extremely average food, rather tired facilities (renewed in 2011!) and the abomination that was self-served, freeze dried coffee at the breakfast buffet (truly unforgiveable.) means that I doubt we will be booking Pontins again. 

I will however be making a rather interesting phone call tomorrow.

Until next time…

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